The last week or so I have been having dreams where I am going bald. For days now I have resisted the temptation to surf the plethora or dream dictionary websites to find out what it could really mean. That is until today when I discovered that such interesting facts that, I was scared of getting old, I was probably feeling unattractive, and considering that I wasn't intelligent.
So after I took a course of botox...
Anyway what I am aware of is that very soon I am to lose all my hair. There are a couple of special people dear to me fighting cancer at the moment, one of whom has just begun chemotherapy. Several of us have decided that when my friend begins to loose her hair we will join her in shaving ours off too. I kind of think there is so much of this journey I can not take with her I can at least join her in this. Her hair is so precious to her, and I am discovering so too is mine to me.
I don't consider my hair often, its just kind of there really. But loosing it feels suddenly very exposing, I am aware of the social stigmas around hair, of how I look at women without hair. I wonder what messages I have told my self in passing, what assumptions I have made.
And how I am a little scared of what assumptions people will make of me...
My vicar is also having his hair shaved off but as a bloke I do think it is a little different (although that could be because I am married to a man who blade shaves his head). I have been trying to convince my vicar that in the mean time it would be far more noble to let us wax his legs $10 her wax strip - but for some reason he's not so enthusiastic.
Anyway so in the next fortnight I will lose my hair. I look in the mirror and wonder if my friend looks at hers in the same way.
I just know Im going to look like a bowling ball
Bring on the hats